26
07:31:00
As the weather was warm, she moved to the balcony. She buried herself in books, magazines, and cosmetics. She ate fruit and drank water, as she was terrified by the amount of weight she gained over the last few months. She could barely breathe. She lost everything: her studies, her social life, her freedom. She was deprived of everything she loved so much. She was getting bigger and her only freedom was sitting on the balcony since long walks started to become more tiresome. He was sitting in his room, cooling himself with a fan. The fan didn’t really deafen her heavy breath but made him less heard from the room.
She tried to be nice to him. She played his music along with hers, she offered him some fruit which she couldn’t finish. With terror, she observed the packages that she received from the courier as they were wrapped up in sweet little kids stuff and baby faces as if he had ordered manuals on how to bring up a child. The last thing she wanted was to spend her days preparing herself for the hell she was about to enter. The child was a little human. The kids business was just a business. As if feeding and nourishing the child wasn’t an expense in itself. Why were kids to follow fashion and the latest trends when they couldn’t even read? Why were they supposed to be obsessed with one more cartoon or silly invented character? Why were they supposed to have a happy and blissful childhood while their parents didn’t have such a childhood? Why current generations always strove to make future generations better off? And why, on the other hand, those generations were shocked when they didn’t really have it better than their parents? Once you bought those thousands of toys, invested in the well of child’s wishes, you could make it disillusioned when other people, economy, and future wouldn’t give you the same amount of things. She didn’t like spoiled kids.
And again, it all came down to money. The child wasn’t a pet that so many people still couldn’t keep for a lifetime. The child wasn’t a toy that you abandoned when you got bored. The child was like her: a mistaken creature, a flawed individual, an outcome of her one-night stand. And it kicked like crazy, wanting to have all that the world was about to offer. While she wasn’t able to offer it anything. She wasn’t even able to offer it love.
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